Prompt: Muddle
// My head aches, I’m dizzy, and my thoughts are all
muddled. I’m just plain exhausted. No, I’m not sick. I’ve just been on the
internet for too long! I really just got on to check an e-mail. But there was
Facebook and there were several good articles that friends posted.
Well, I
guess only a couple were really good, but the others sure had catchy titles and
I couldn’t resist checking them out. Now an hour later here I am, full to the
brim with sorts of information about politics, how to be an amazing mother, how
I’m failing at cutting my risk of cancer because I only run 3 times a week
instead of 4, and how I can pray for the latest crisis.
The problem is… I am so plain worn out that my brain can’t
focus on anything. I won’t actually use any of this stuff I’ve focused on so
intently over the last hour because it
was too much.
I am overwhelmed with information, good ideas, creative meal
plans, the dire situation of our country, and tragic circumstances around the
globe. I am frozen and paralyzed. My brain is too numb even to care very deeply
anymore and now I don’t even feel like making a meal for my family, much less
the week of creative culinary art that I browsed for so long. //
And I’m not sure I just handled that “situation” with the
kids very graciously. I was too distracted to deal with it before it escalated
to utter ridiculousness. So then I just “sternly” told them they could all go
sit in their beds for being so unkind to one another. I probably should just go
sit in my bed, too, if that’s the remedy for unkindness.
The problem is my brain is in a muddle from looking at the
problems of the world, a 101 “good ideas” for mothering, homeschooling,
cooking, and decorating for fall, so I’ve neglected the one thing I sat down to
do – check that one e-mail that I’ve been meaning to get back to for a week.
And not only that, I’ve neglected the needs and people right
in front of my face. I still haven’t gotten to the “good ideas” I had vision
for just last week, because now I’m hungry for something new. Some new promise
of happiness, contentment, or success. The ones from last week have already
proven empty. But maybe these new ones…
Maybe they are all just smoke and mirrors, too. Maybe there
is meaning and contentment in this room with me if I get offline. Maybe dealing
with that one issue right in front of me will be more impacting than reading about
all the other issues I could be involved in. Maybe world peace will suffer as a
result, but maybe it’s worth the risk. ;)
Continuing on with my Write 31 Days theme of "31 Days to Slowing Down and Living More Simply"
with reflections based on my reading of Emily P. Freeman's book Simply Tuesday and the prompts given at the FMFW page. My "Five Minute Free Write" portion will be enclosed with // and any extra thoughts will follow.
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